154. The Way We Greet | 我們打招呼的方式
– Musings of Dr. Jamie C. Hsu, 1.28.2024
We greet people all the time and seldom think much of it. But if you look deeper into it, you will find some interesting insights. How we greet at different stages of our lives, to whom, on what occasions, and under what circumstances, will all influence what we say and how we say it. Here are some general observations:
We ask kids and youth: How tall are you? What do you want to be when you grow up? Which school are you going to now?
We ask adults: How is your career? Do you like your job? Are you married? Any kids?
We ask seniors: How many grandkids do you have? Do you have a chance to visit them often? Are you planning any vacation trips? How do you like your retirement?
We ask elders: How is your health? How do you alleviate pain? Do you have some good doctors to recommend?
Then in people’s twilight years, we ask: Are you ok? Who is taking care of you? Have you planned for the inevitable?
We also greet people depending on how well we know them. We greet with the generic “How are you?” “What’s up?” or the circumstance-specifics such as “Happy Holidays!” “Did you get Covid-19?” or “Did you watch the Lion’s football game?”
The greetings also change with time, life in ancient China was tough due to famine and poverty, and people always ask “Have you eaten yet?” Now we ask “Are you on diet?”
The more personal and empathetic greetings are given less frequently, unless we are very close to the person and know well their situation and current mood. When a close friend encounters a setback at work, loses a partner, or is fighting a disease, we give a heartfelt greeting of “What can I do for you?” “Do you want to talk about it?” or “How do I accompany you through this tough time?” All of us should be the type of friend, or have a friend, who offers greetings like this.
It will be an eye-opening experience if you examine the greetings you give over the next few weeks. They will tell you more about yourself, the stage of your life, and the people you encounter.
我們打招呼的方式 (2024/01/28)
-作者 許俊宸博士
-中譯 薛乃綺
我們經常打招呼，但通常不太會去思考它。如果你深入去想想，會發現一些有趣的見解。我們在不同階段生活中如何打招呼、對誰打招呼、在什麼場合、以及在什麼情況下，都會影響我們說什麼和如何說。以下是一些觀察的心得：
我們會問小朋友及年輕人：你有多高啊？長大後想做什麼？你現在上哪個學校？
我們問大朋友：你的工作和職場如何？你喜歡你的工作嗎？你結婚了嗎？有孩子嗎？
我們問老人家：你有幾個孫子孫女？有常常去看他們嗎？有沒有計劃去度假？你喜歡你的退休生活嗎？
我們問長輩：你身體還好嗎？如何緩解疼痛？有沒有一些好的醫生可以推薦？
然後在人們晚年時，經常被問到：你現在還好嗎？有沒有人在照顧你？你有為不可避免的事情做好計劃嗎？
此外，我們也會根據自己本身對他們的了解程度來打招呼。通常會問候像是：”你好嗎？”、”有什麼新鮮事啊？”，或是根據特定情況的問候語，像是”某某節日快樂！”，”你有感染Covid嗎？”、或者是”你看了獅子隊的足球比賽嗎？”
时代也会影响我们的問候。中国古代常闹饥荒，人们总是問“吃过了吗？。 如今，改成问“你是非在节食？”
更私人的、和更同理心的問候就不常見了。除非我們跟這個人非常親近，而且瞭解到他/她的處境和當下的心情。當一個親近的朋友在工作上遭遇挫折、失去伴侶、或者正在與疾病奮鬥時，我們會給他/她衷心的問候，比如說:” 我能為你做什麼？”、”你想談談嗎？”、”我該怎麼陪伴你度過這個艱難的時刻？”
我們都應該有這樣的朋友，或者成為這樣的朋友，提供這樣的問候。
如果你在接下來的幾周內檢視一下你所給予的問候，這可能會是一次很衝擊或者令你大吃一驚的經驗。這些打招呼可能會告訴你更多有關你自己、你處於的生活階段以及你所遇到的人的訊息。
